Late-Identified, High-Masking, Highly Perceptive, Non-Stereotypical Autism/Neurodivergence
I specialize in helping clients who have begun to suspect they have aspects of Autism/neurodivergence or have recently identified themselves as Autistic/neurodivergent. My clients don’t fit the stereotypical, textbook picture of Autism so that’s why it’s hard to see it fits them, and they realize it later in life. Some of the information coming out on social media about Autism from the new neurodiversity affirming lens is often how my clients start to realize it might fit them. A lot of my clients find the word “Autism” hard to read/say or feel that it fits them, partly due to the stigma but also because my clients don’t fit society’s understanding of this concept; in a lot of cases they have the exact opposite of some of the stereotypical traits.
I work with “high masking” Autistic people who’ve historically learned to hide or not fully express their authentic selves; these clients might be so used to and skilled at this, they don’t even realize they’re doing it. They tend to be good at picking up on social cues, reading other peoples’ feelings, and recognizing patterns in the world and in others, which is the opposite of what society is taught about Autism. This awareness can feel like a burden, and it can be very draining, especially when we get messages from others to not listen to ourselves and that we’re incorrect. Actually what we’re experiencing is often accurate and real, but we might doubt it. My clients often like to learn about psychology, deep dive about their interests in a way that others don’t get, have unique social perceptual abilities, don’t like small talk, and want to connect deeply to others, but they have felt misunderstood or had a hard time finding or keeping connections with people who fully “get” them. Some of my clients historically learned on alcohol to help “mask” and dull the sting that existed within these interactions.
Some of my clients have related to the “highly sensitive person” label, but others are actually under-sensitive without realizing it and don’t resonate with the sensory difficulties at all of trouble with clothing or texture in foods etc. If you’re under-sensitive to some sensory stimuli, it can be even harder to think that you’re Autistic, since again, that doesn’t fit the stereotypical image.